Friday, April 28, 2006

He's Back - And No More Mr Nice Guy

The mighty Littlejohn intervenes in the Prescott debate like a battleship in a cruiser fight.

From the opening salvo :

"So now we know why Two Jags always has the tetchy air of a man about to have his collar felt. Why he reacts to even the most innocuous question with an invitation to step outside.
He's been living in mortal dread of that moment when Fleet Street's finest knock on his door and ask him how long he's been cheating on his wife."

the shrapnel clearing the decks :

"a loathsome, Soviet-style political thug on the make"

"In his ascent — if that's the word — to the Office of the Deputy Prime Minister, Two Jags has jettisoned everything he ever claimed to believe in. He's betrayed his class, his principles, and now his wife.

He has greedily acquired all the trappings of a Tory grandee — the turreted mansion, the country estate, the posh flat in town, the chauffeured limos, the private helicopters, the liveried flunkies, the padded expense account.

And now he's got his very own Tory sex scandal."

the steering gear and generators are gone :

"Tracey Temple hasn't surfaced yet. But her story will be worth a lot of money, and the Labour Party, in its current parlous financial state, can't afford to buy her silence.

Don't be surprised if she turns up in one of the Sunday tabloids sprawled across the bonnet of an XJ6, sporting a sailor's cap and telling all about "love rat" Prescott."

before the final blow to the engine room :

"Experience suggests that a man doesn't suddenly start straying at 63. How many more "moments of madness" have there been?

I'm prepared to bet that once Fleet Street's dogs of war start trawling through the Labour Party, the National Union of Seamen and the darker corners of the corridors of power, this will prove not to have been the first time Two Jags has dipped his fingers in the typing pool.

My bet is that Max Clifford's phone was ringing off the hook yesterday."

We watch with a lump in the throat as the great shape rolls over, slowly sinking beneath the waves.

"Prescott's tenure has been one, long, unmitigated disaster. Where do you want to start? Perm any one from destroying the transport network to bulldozing the North of England to concreting over the South of England.

He's only been doing to Tracey what he's been doing to the rest of us for the past nine years. "


AntiCitizenOne said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
JuliaM said...


This is the most fun to be had from politics for years.... Can it get any better?

Laban said...

I have already said that I do not believe a Labour junior minister - and self-professed feminist - could so cruelly betray another sister.

The person you name campaigns vigourously against such curses as domestic violence - I just can't envisage a situation where such hypocrisy could exist.

Squander Two said...

Don't know whether you've seen it already, Laban, but thought you might find my latest interesting.

Annoying to see on Question Time last night that the Tory leadership are insisting this is a purely personal matter, nothing to do with them or anyone else except Prescott and his wife. Don't they want votes? I suspect they just want to preserve their own "right" not to lose a job when they get caught at it.